My Reelity

As you all know, nowadays, thanks to Eve, I’m now carrying my showreel around with me. So this CNY, as we went on our annual meet-the-distant-relatives-once rounds, it would be inevitable that some of them would not have noticed my exploits on screen. ( Yes, it is possible because yours truly don’t really get that much screen time 😛 )

As my acting career always seem to border on the non-existential, my father has over the past years decide to use it as a conversation topic when we meet these relatives, partly, I suspect, so that he would not be forced to talk about his own short comings. So this year, knowing that I have portable “evidence”, he relished almost every chance to talk about me being a non-existent actor.

When his audience gets wide-eyed and stares at me in disbelief, he would ask me to whip the damn thang out and quelch their skepticism. I generally take such things in my stride, because after all, I don’t blame people for not knowing. In fact, its more like a stark reminder that I have a long way to go because if I truly am making some headway, these relatives would have recognise me and asked me on their own accord. And this is the very reason why I don’t go round telling people I’m an actor because I believe that my work should speak for me and itself. If you have not seen my performances before, its cool, cuz like I said, I don’t get that much screen time. But if you have and are wondering if its me, I would not hesitate to confess to you my identity.

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Its been a few weeks since my last entry, but that does not mean I have not been dreaming. Rather, I have been dreaming of a sequence of late, but I cannot remember enough of the details when I wake up, which makes it difficult to write an entry about it. Hopefully, this sequence will continue so that I will get a chance to remember it properly.

Last night, I continued a sequence where I left off months ago. This sequence also kinda start abruptly, and is about me and a few dream-self friends taking a trip to some island. As always, these “friends” will know my dream-self very well and vice-versa, but I have never seen them in real life before.

We started off in a boat, and I am told we are off to a sailing trip. Previous trips have been a diving one and a white water rafting one. I remember the diving one best, its a weird one where we have to swim along the seabed from one island to another. Then in the middle of the swim, I remember coming across this huge vastness; its like being in the middle of the dessert, and I am underwater.  The weird part was the water was so clear that when I looked up I could see the night sky above me.
Anyway, back to the dream. So it turns out that we are on a ferry to another island where we will then board another sail boat. There were supposed to be nine of us in the boat, and we were waiting for the others to board. I remember wanting to get out of the boat to go get something (forgot what is it that I needed to get), but decided against it as I was afraid I will cause everyone else to be late. Just as I was musing over my decision, I realised that I was dreaming, and decided that I should exercise my powers and put the missing luggage that I forgot to bring into the boat with me.

The next thing I know, the boat was suddenly overcrowded. Instead of 9 peeps, it now has 12 peeps! Luckily, the boat could still take the number and so we made our way to the island. I used to think the island was in Malaysia or something, but in this dream, I realised that the name of the island has never been mentioned in the sequence before. The weird part is my dream-self also never bothered to ask, it was as if he already knew. We arrived at the jetty, and was told we would need to travel quite a bit to where the sail boat is. The leader tells us that we are going to cycle there, and while the rest of the party seemed to be renting bikes, it turns out that I have brought along my own personal portable one.

We manouvered through slopes and winding pathways before arriving at a structure that has flight of stairs zig-zagging around it. It looks like one of those Aztecian or Mayan structures and I remember following one of the party member as we negotiated it.

That’s where the dream ended. Hopefully, I will remember how it continues from here.

Wishing all my readers a happy and prosperous Chinese New Year! If the previous year has been one of Cock-ups, may this be one full of hot dogs and bitches in heat!

And if you really want to be loony and nude, I say, go for it! Go wild! Let the Mad Dog out! 😛

While buying lunch today, the yong tau foo seller (who had already seen me on telly before) told me she just caught me on “Love Concierge” last night.

Luckily she told me before she handed me my food or my double take would have caused me to spill some foo over me… Yeah, I’m still not used to people recognising me…

Anyway, we chatted a little, and it took quite a bit of convincing for her to believe that I’m not on contract with the station (I wish!). She also mentioned that I looked quite suitable in the role (I was playing a *koff koff* auditor) and said that she couldn’t imagine me playing a bad guy.

So you see hor, at least someone else out there believes I’m too good to be bad. 😛

Her words made me glad that I have stuck to my guns and avoided being typecast in the first place. But just so you know, I think its time for me to be a bad boy again.

Tagged by the one who drinkeths a lot who wants to know weird stuff about me. (Errm, you don’t find me weird enough meh?)

Alrighty then, off the top of my head;

One of the weird thing about me is that people like to believe me when I’m lying and don’t believe me when I’m telling the truth. Go figure. I think these people are even more weird than me. o.O

Another weird thing about me is that I have a really low sugar tolerance. Yes, I hate the sweet stuff. Yes, I don’t even like to eat my own birthday cake. But hor, I do like sweet young things. Heh, go figure.

And people tell me I’m corny. Actually, they say I’m very corny. But I hate corn to the core. Heck I hate corn even before seeing its core. I think its natural for me to hate corn since I’m already so corny. I’m cool weird like that.

I have weird dreams. They are weird because I always seem to be in a parallel universe in them. They are weird because there are story sequences that will continue months after I’ve stopped dreaming those sequences. Hmm, ok, maybe they are not as weird as they are scary. Heh.

I’m actually quite proud to be so weird. Yeah, I’m cool weird like that. I don’t cry at funerals. I first noticed this when my beloved grandmother died while I was still a small kid, and I have continued not crying ever since. Not even when my cat, whom I loved very much, diet. Don’t ask me why. I just don’t cry at funerals.

So, let the weirdness spread to :

Qiaoyun
Ely
Mr Lim
Liz & David
Joel

Sometimes, it is really not easy. Even after all these years.

These past few days, while out on a feed-the-stomach assignment, I was reminded once again of the massive opportunity cost of living my dreams. You see, I got to know about a former course mate’s pay package while I was out on the assignment. And man, was it huge! Its a stark reminder to me that had I not took the other path, this would be potentially what I could be making. Things like this used to depress me quite a bit when I was starting out such that I would purposely avoid finding out what my peers were earning.

You know, its really almost impossible not to know. So I have learnt to accept this opportunity cost as my price for dreaming, and continued pursuing my passion. As the years go by, with me not getting closer to achieving anything remotely significant, the cost of dreaming just scales higher and higher and higher…

As I stared at his pay package, I felt, for the first time in years, the full brunt of the high cost of dreaming. A very good friend who came to know about it posed the question of me turning back. But you know what they say about good horses not eating turned back grass (好马不吃回头草)…well, its true.

Coz I’m a dman fine stud lor. 😀

As my dry season continues, I lamented to Serena, oops I mean, Qiao Yun (Catch her in “I Not Stupid Too”!) about feeling jaded nowadays. We exchanged sad stories, expressed anger at idiots and marvel at other idiosyncracies happening in the industry. She did her best to raise my spirits and left me with these lingering words,

Don’t let your loss of faith in the industry smother your passion for acting

Thanks babe, I really needed to hear that.
Oh and today, I turned down my first role in Oh Sex! No, yours truly do not want to be an extra in your short film, featured or not featured. But I really think I didn’t get the role I auditioned for because of some bad blood between me and the director in the past. Oh well…

On a more irrelevant note, I saw this on a greeting card, where the woman was talking to a bemused man,

“Why is the SPACE between the breasts and hips called a WAIST?”

Geddit? 😉

Did you all know that the hokkien name for “Unchained Melody” is “Ah Cheng Buey Loh Ti” (means : Ah Cheng buys bread)? Hence the title of this post hehehe.

It has finally stop raining, and if you observe carefully, it stopped raining after it has been reported that it will continue raining for the next few weeks. LOL. You gotta love the irony.

A few days ago, I received notification that I have finally paid off my study loan, a grand total of almost $14k. Back then, I had opted the longest repayment period, as I knew I would have need for a better cashflow, never mind the interest. (Actually, since I was paying back into my father’s CPF account, I didn’t mind paying the interest hehehe) Still, its always a pinch every month to see this amount being deducted, so I feel great that I have finally broken off the shackles of one of those things that have been bleeding my bank account.

A slightly more debt free me near the start of the year. Oh Sex is really looking good so far. 😀

‘Nuff said.

Zeus’s wedding was a blast. He looks so happy that I think Hera will have no worries about him sneaking off to chase mortal lasses for eternity. It was interesting to find that Olympian weddings are actually quite similar to the ones back home, only I think our aggressiveness at the barricades prolly startled the guardians, who most probably expected a more docile negotiation.

I guess Zeus forgot to inform them his entourage was from the finest Valhalla had to offer, and the Colossus that gallently halted our progress also had to give way eventually. But I cannot take credit for being part of the assault force; lets just say I’m really not a morning person, and the lack of caffeine and an uncleared bowel does not find me in the best of form at all.

The dinner had its fair share of pranks and sabotage, but I think having witness the surprised reaction from the residents of Olympus much earlier, we decided to tone down our normal Viking traditions and spared Zeus the more raunchy ones. I must say the nectar that they served somehow pales in comparison to what I have been used to having. Bah, I guess nothing beats Norse mead! *hic*

Olympus really have some weird architecture man. Somehow or other, they really like squares and blocks. Must be all the mathematics. Sheesh. Even Zeus was quite amused by it all. Think he should prolly talk to Vulcan about it instead of just being amused, liew. BTW Zeus, if you are reading this, I popped by the spa room again after we left and they managed to get the bubbles in the volcanic pool working. Grrrr.

Olympus also had lots of rooms to spare, and oh how they spared us our rooms! Our accomodations certainly beats the one we have back at the Halls. I think its the first time I really really felt like a Norse god living in a penthouse. Hehehe, one can certainly get use to this feeling 😀 (Pics will be up later!)

All in all, I think it was quite a good trip. Thanks to all those who had kindly offered to drive the bunch of us up. I know it has been really tiring for you all. You guys rawk!

Oh and would you believe it? Venus was at the wedding too! But she looked damn young. Heh.