Today’s shoot was a couple of firsts for me.
First, I almost went topless. Aye, I think I would have went topless for the first time if not for the director to see my state of fattiness and decide that shocking audiences with my lumps would not be good for television. But he asked me to unbutton my pajama top instead, so I guess there would still be a certain “shock” value to the scene.
So yeah, its the first time I’m partially topless on screen and its the first time I’m in my pjs on screen.
It was also my first time crying on cue. And I don’t think I did a good job. My preparation for the scene was kinda rushed as they pushed it to be done ahead of another scene at the very last minute. And I felt really bad about it cuz I really wanted to do well for the scene. The funny thing is I know I had really gotten as much emotion as I could for the scene, judging from the effort I had to put through to recover myself for a happy scene next. I just can’t figure out what was blocking the full onset of the emotions there and then. Performance anxiety? Perhaps.
The next scene was a birthday party scene that was quite different from what was played out in the script. So in the end, I got a surprise screen kiss, which was also my first screen kiss. It wasn’t the passionate kind, it was more of the bashful peck kind. And yeah, I guess I was kinda bashful about it initially, which resulted in a few takes cuz the director felt our chemistry wasn’t warm enough. So for the record, I did not purposely force the extra takes hor! 😛
I was mulling over why I couldn’t do well for the crying scene and my only logical conclusion at this moment is that perhaps, I’ve used the wrong emotional anchor. Yes, I’m kinda ashamed that I’ve been wanting to use this “crutch” to get through the scene, and I guess in the past, when I could do it, was because I didn’t had closure. And since I have recently come to terms with it, trying to re-live this tearful experience couldn’t quite achieve the effect I wanted.
I believe, given time (which I didn’t and didn’t dare ask for in this scene), I could have achieved the desired effect but I’ve also come to realise that maybe a better approach would be to focus more on the character’s actual situation rather than trying to use an emotional anchor.
I have another tearful scene tomorrow, and I think I will use another method and see how that goes (it went well while I was showering :P) …
I guess what this proves is that I really had closure. Heh.
Lol, interesting shoots you had there… 😉
“It was also my first time crying on cue. And I don’t think I did a good job.”
this part i read “BLOW job” and tot “no wonder wanna cry…” then i reread it. ceh.
im too tired lar.
Boo, I think you just wanna give me a bj. 😉