My Reelity

Wanted to blog about this last week, which was when I bit the bullet and applied for yet again another job position.

And just like the previous one, it wasn’t a position that I had actively searched for, but one where again I was the target of a commendation. The person who approached me was a previous client of mine and she thought that I had been busy acting all this while, as she had seen me loads of time on telly recently (Just how many reruns are they doing seriously?! >.<). When she realised that that wasn't the case, she immediately asked if I wanted a full-time position. I told her I'd rather take the part-time option as I'm not quite ready to throw in the towel. Yet. But taking on this new job is, in a way, a sign of me lowering my priorities for acting. Where it once used to be the be all and end all, this journey is now well into its 7th year and let's face it folks, I'm not getting any younger. I don't think I can continue to let it be the screw-everything-else kind of priority that it used to be simply because gee, this really doesn't pay the rent. I need to start looking for other options, cuz as much as I love acting, I'm really not contented to just let things be the way it is now for the next five years. So if I get this job, it'll give me a little bit more stability. At the cost of some flexibility. What it means is that I can no longer drop everything like a hat and scoot off for a shoot. Not to say that I've been doing this all this time, but you must admit it is really nice to have that option open. And I've kept that option open for more than six years now, in hopes that a big break will come and make me utilise it... and well, you know the rest of the story. And I think I've given this a decent shot already, but I can't keep waiting for ever, not when other options are opening up. This job still gives me time to act, its just that flexibility is being compromised. So relax, like I said, I'm not throwing in the towel. I'm just re-strategising I guess. Cuz another reason, and perhaps a more compelling one, is that I think I'm kinda stuck in a rut now as well. I'm getting way too comfortable, and I'm losing the hunger, which is really not a good sign. If I do get this job, I feel this would jolt me out of my comfort zone, and the new challenges and change of environment will do me, and my acting, a whole lot of good. So trust me, I'm scratching this itch, but its all in the name of love (of acting). 😉